Nicholas Efthim

Nicholas Efthim, age 94, passed away peacefully on Tuesday, January 28, 2025, at the Ellis Nursing and Rehabilitation Center in Norwood, Massachusetts.

In lieu of a funeral including a eulogy, I offer the following biography/tribute to my father.

Born in Natick August 28, 1930 to Krisanthi (Kreshpani) and Herackly Efthim who had emigrated from Albania. For years they lived in a row house, the other unit occupied by cousins who would feel like siblings to my dad, especially Dita Kreshpani Katsis and her late sister Joanna. The kids were hearing only Albanian at home but learned English well enough in their neighborhood to be able to assimilate into the Natick schools. Herackly enjoyed being in the grocery business like he had been in Albania, and he had a small stand in Boston where the State Street Bank currently exists. He sold fruit mostly, then saved money to build a bigger stand and added sandwiches, soft drinks and tobacco products. He would do well enough to buy a single-family home in Natick with a convenience store downtown which he would run for years with my dad and his brothers being the unpaid staff.

Nick enjoyed Natick High School and took pride in being “pretty damn good at basketball for a short guy.” He was a member of the National Honor Society and a writer for the school newspaper. He grew up a member of the Annunciation Orthodox Church in Natick, was a member of the choir and became choir director while still in his 20’s. He started at Northeastern University because their co-op program allowed him to earn his tuition. To get to Boston he would walk to Route 9 in Natick where he would hitchhike to Boston. At NU he met Dolores saying, “the minute I saw her I knew I needed her to be my wife.” He even admired her white “bobby socks”, loafers, and “nice legs” even though the skirt length went down to the socks. Nick made money to take Dolores on dates by hustling pool at the pool hall in Natick. He was one year ahead of her in school and said he said he was so nervous her senior year there without him because he was afraid some other guy would “steal her.” 

After my mom graduated, they became engaged, but they had to wait a year of mourning before they could have a wedding because of the tragic loss of Nick’s sister Dora at age 28 due to an autoimmune disorder. Their wedding was apparently a great occasion in November 1955 with a dusting of snow at the wedding then a honeymoon in Miami. In Miami they saw flights to Havana and my dad said to my mom, “let’s surprise your grandmother and go!” They flew to Havana and when they rang the doorbell my great grandmother was so shocked at first, she wouldn’t open the door.

Their first apartment was in Norwood, MA where Nick was the assistant administrator at Norwood Hospital and Dolores took the train to Massachusetts General Hospital where she was a medical secretary. She worked there until one day in 1957 when she was admitted to Norwood Hospital and while her husband was in his office, I was born. Even in his 90’s Nick would tell the story that his office phone rang, and a nurse let him know he had a daughter. Two medical salesmen were in his office at the time, and they said “Let’s go to the bar down the street to celebrate”, (undoubtedly Lewis’) He declined their offer and went to look through the nursery window instead. He continued to work in hospital administration, moving to larger hospitals each time so he went from Norwood, to Framingham, to Springfield. He left Springfield to work for Electrodyne in Norwood selling EKG monitoring equipment which is how we ended up in Walpole. He made an offer on 36 Hutchinson Road without my mom ever seeing the house but luckily, when she and I arrived from Springfield she loved the house.

A story that defines the phrase “you can’t make this __ up” on New Years Day 1967 a service tech called my father and said he was dreadfully hungover, could my dad go to Goddard Hospital to look at a monitor that was apparently not working. Off to Stoughton he went and upon arrival he hooked himself up and saw an abnormal heart rhythm. Feeling fine, he decided that the monitor wasn’t working so he tried another monitor and saw an abnormal EKG again. He took apart both units, didn’t see a problem and a cardiologist came by looking for a monitor and after a lengthy heated discussion admitted him to the hospital for what was labeled a “heart incident”. He was 36. He was still in the hospital on January 15 which was Super Bowl I. The doctor told my dad not to watch the game but of course he did. He had a heart attack at 44, another at 53, and at 66 had quadruple bypass surgery which serviced him well as he passed at age 94.

During his years at Electrodyne he was continually promoted until he became National Sales Manager. He traveled often and had great stories to tell when he got home. One time he went to an Amish hospital where the staff didn’t grow up using electricity but needed to use it at work. A nurse asked him if she had something in her right hand, would the monitor still work if she plugged it in with her left hand. He would end that story by saying “I’m so glad I didn’t laugh. I thought she was putting me on!”

The chief electrical engineer at Electrodyne partnered with a prominent Boston cardiologist and pacemakers became available. My father couldn’t wait to become involved and would start a new chapter in his career in pacemaker sales. He became a manufacturers rep and called his company Pacemaker Systems & Instrumentation. It was alleged that he sold more pacemakers than anyone else in the United States which is somewhat believable since so many were being done in Boston hospitals and for years he sold a brand with the longest shelf life. He sat in lines during the gas shortage in the 1970’s and was getting aggravated with his Mercury Grand Marquis which got approximately 10 miles to the gallon. He saw a solution in setting it up to be stolen. He left it unlocked, keys in it, on the rooftop parking at Logan Airport and parked it behind a huge HVAC unit for ultimate theft privacy. He boarded a flight and told my mom to expect a call to have to pick him up upon his return, but unfortunately the land yacht was right where he left it.

My father loved cars and enjoyed a kit car for several years which was a VW engine in a replica of an old roadster. When he got bored +with it, the owner of the Union Oyster House bought it and parked it in front of his restaurant where it sat for years. When he sold pacemakers for a company called Intermedics they were an Indy 500 sponsor. He was thrilled to go to that race 3 times. Dad loved the swag and wore his Intermedics Indy 500 sweater and jacket so often my mother would demand he put them in the wash occasionally. Per his request he will be buried in one of his Intermedics jackets.

My parents enjoyed dancing and always looked forward to dining and dancing with “The Group” including Jim & Ellen Delaney, Henry & Marion Pare, Fred and Virginia Grosso, and Woody and Anita Sullivan.

 Known as Baba, my dad adored his grandchildren, Nick and Jill. “Little Nicky” was lucky to have daycare provided by my parents, grandmother and aunt. At age 2 my dad decided he’d take him to swim as my dad was a member of what was The Club. My dad forever told the story of Nick doing cannonballs onto him as my dad tried to swim laps. While someone else would have been angry, my father laughed. When I was told I could have my second baby on my dad’s 60th birthday 8/28, I told my dad and his immediate response was, “NO! The kid deserves its own day!” so Jill was given her day and we always celebrated them both together. My dad, “little Nicky” and I spent swimming 8/28/90 at Beaver Pond in Franklin where Jill and Max’s son, Theo now plays and swims and I just love seeing him there as the next generation.

My parents would have been married 70 years on 11/19/24 but she passed 10/28 and he and I were by her side but since being diagnosed with dementia in 2014, he didn’t remember she passed. Perhaps he was spared the pain of losing her.

My parents always enjoyed the company of my in laws, George & Barbara O’Rourke who lived in Billerica as well as my late husband’s parents Marlin & Sharon Marsh who lived in Framingham before returning to their home state of Oregon.

I may not have had siblings, but I have more supportive and loving cousins than I can possibly list, and I have been blessed with the Albanian side of my family. Their phone calls, texts, love and support have always made me feel not the least bit alone. As with my mom’s decline, my cousin Tracy has been there during difficult times not limited to but including having to be the family realtor for four moves. Tracy is a fountain of patience, and I both love and appreciate her.

People say I have been a devoted daughter, but they don’t see me fall apart and it’s my husband who puts me back together again. His quiet but strong and effective manner is my saving grace.

I have deep respect and gratitude to the Ellis Nursing Home in Norwood where I have met staff that have consistently been available to both my parents (my mother was his roommate for almost 3 years before she passed). The CNA’s have more people in need of care than seems possible in a shift, but the Cherrywood staff come together to help each other, which is due to their work ethic and devotion as well as the unit manager Denise. Veronica was an incredible advocate for my father, and I will always respect the care she provided to him as well as Denise, Joann, Marcine, Soupha, MaryLou, Fiona and so many others who I don’t see on the night shift. My appreciation cannot be expressed adequately.

Thank you to the Delaney Funeral Home staff and family, longtime family friends who are always compassionate and thoughtful and have been there for us since my grandfather’s passing in 1982 and for each loss since.

I perjetshim kujtimi - Memory Eternal as is said in Albanian. How many times he sang that chant for his sister, his cousins, parents, and friends within the Albanian community cannot be counted and I will hear him sing it in my head always. Three times in Albanian, three times in English to honor the Holy Trinity.

My father’s memory will most certainly be eternal for me and for our family. He was always generous, so happy to envelope you in his arms, hear all that you had to say, and ready to laugh. We will miss his quick wit, his humor and readiness to tell you how he feels and what he’s thinking. He made me teary recently by saying that when he sees me come into his room at Ellis, his heart feels like a tank being filled up with love. He would always tell you when he loved or appreciated you and this included family, friends and the staff at Ellis that became family to him.

On behalf of my husband Michael, my son Nick O’Rourke, his wife Heather, their son Jackson Marsh O’Rourke, my daughter Jill Perkins and her husband Max, their son Theo P. Michael, we thank you for attending and remain grateful for your presence.

-Carole O’Rourke

Beloved husband of the late Dolores A. (Pereira) Efthim.

Loving father of Carole J. O’Rourke and her husband, Michael, of Medway.

Cherished Baba of Nick O’Rourke and his wife, Heather, of Andover, New Hampshire and Jill Perkins and her husband, Max, of Medway; and great grandfather of Theo P. Michael Perkins and Jackson Marsh O’Rourke.

Brother of William Efthim and his wife, Roberta Mavis, of Weston, the late Peter Efthim and his late wife, Shirley, and the late Dora Efthim.

Doting uncle of Carole Schiloski of Framingham, Paul Efthim and his wife, Karen Estrella, of Belmont, Tracy D'Avignon and her husband, James, of Medfield, Robert Efthim and his wife, Rosetta, of Tallahassee, Florida, and the late Natalie Mullen.

Relatives and friends are kindly invited to attend Nick’s Life Celebration on Sunday, February 2, 2025, from 1:00 to 3:00 pm in the James H. Delaney & Son Funeral Home, 48 Common Street, Walpole. Interment will take place privately at Saint Francis Cemetery in Walpole.

In lieu of flowers, memorial donations in Nick’s name may be made to The Dolores Pereira Efthim Memorial Scholarship, c/o Walpole High School, 275 Common Street, Walpole, MA 02081, ATTN: Deb Wolfe.